Tag: Random

Small Town Scandals

What was the biggest scandal in your small town? from AskReddit

All-Seeing Upvote
DARE officer selling drugs that were evidence.

My fifth grade DARE officer hit on me at a high school football game while I was still in high school and while we was on duty. I’d smoked and drank to pregame right before too. While flirting he asked if his DARE education worked. Buddy NO. On all counts.

We had a US Marshal come to health class my sophomore year of high school. He gave us Starbursts when we got questions right. It was awesome!

Mayor and several city councillors were taking kickbacks and bribes from demolition/construction/cleaning companies for clean up contracts after a hurricane, funded by FEMA.

The companies would give the mayor and city councillors like a couple grand, then the company would get FEMA funds in the tens of thousands to clean up/destroy a hurricane damaged property, only the address given to FEMA and listed on the contract were fake, or already cleared, so the companies got paid to do nothing.

College professor was found tied to a tree and burned months after he disappeared. Police ruled it a suicide

Our english teacher *raped half the boys track team in high school… AND slept with the vice principal… AND the gym teacher.

Everybody knew about it and we were all fairly certain one of the kids was the actual father of her kid, not her husband.

When I came home and told my dad that a teacher had been arrested for sleeping with students, he responded:

“So they finally caught up with Marcie? Two of my apprentices have her nudes and keep showing the rest of us when we’re trying to work.”

I don’t miss my hometown, lol.

Probably the Brown’s Chicken Massacre, where 7 people were murdered at the restaurant over a robbery. Case was cold for 9 years until the girlfriend on one of the murderers went to the police that he had confessed to her. He and his friend were eventually convicted through DNA and a confession.

There was an anesthetist, who worked at our local hospital and another hospital in a different town. He was rather well known among other doctors and known to be good at what he was doing. He only had a small problem with being addicted to pain killers and anaesthetics.

So to feed his addiction without getting caught he shot up part of his patients’ drugs before injecting the same needle into his patient.

Thus went unnoticed until it was discovered that over 60 of his patients got infected with hepatitis. And that he was the source for it.

He was fired and his license revoked as far as I know. But the hospital’s image still suffered quite a bit.

30 Trending Urban Dictionary Definitions


Random Fan Theories – AskReddit

What fan theory do you 100% accept as true? from r/AskReddit

Kermit caused 9/11, not really much of a fan theory though since it’s unintentionally canon

Edit: Realized this should be explained, in the 2002 TV film “It’s a Very Merry Muppet Christmas Movie”, there’s a part where an angel shows Kermit an alternate reality where he was never born. For whatever reason, the editors didn’t really think about it, and continued to use footage with the twin towers still standing for this scene, however they aren’t there in his original universe. Therefore, something that Kermit did in his life, did in fact cause 9/11 in Muppet lore.

Andy’s parents are in the middle of a divorce when the first Toy Story is taking place.

Scooby Doo is a show about draft dodgers during the Vietnam War

The Last Airbender is not, as many have suspected, meant to be a big screen version of the TV show of the same name. It is, in fact, a subtle but clear adaptation of the show’s episode “the Ember Island Players,” in which a poorly informed in-universe theater troupe recap the events of the series in an inaccurate and comedic style.

This was a Reddit post awhile ago actually but the theory was : In Empire Strikes Back, when Luke tells R2 to stay in the ship at various times, he doesn’t stay put, because the last person to tell him that was Anakin and he never came back

James Bond’s primary purpose is to be a distraction to keep attention off the spies who actually spy. Villains and other spies know him, he rarely takes an alias, he makes his presence known early on and keeps messing up operations for the villains, but other spies have already infiltrated their ranks and work while Bond does as much visible damage as possible to keep the others safe.

Peter Pan kills any lost boy that grows into adulthood. Captain Hook and his pirates are all lost boys that have escaped and aim to stop him

Quotes from Stuff Read in 2020

The Buddhists had a helpful analogy here. Picture the mind like a waterfall, they said: the water is the torrent of thoughts and emotions; mindfulness is the space behind the waterfall. Again, elegant theory—but, easier said than done.

The final step—“non-identification”—meant seeing that just because I was feeling angry or jealous or fearful, that did not render me a permanently angry or jealous person. These were just passing states of mind.
Harris, Dan. 10% Happier  

Extreme busyness, whether at school or college, kirk or market, is a symptom of deficient vitality; and a faculty for idleness implies a catholic appetite and a strong sense of personal identity. There is a sort of dead-alive, hackneyed people about, who are scarcely conscious of living except in the exercise of some conventional occupation. Bring these fellows into the country, or set them aboard ship, and you will see how they pine for their desk or their study. They have no curiosity; they cannot give themselves over to random provocations; they do not take pleasure in the exercise of their faculties for its own sake; and unless Necessity lays about them with a stick, they will even stand still. It is no good speaking to such folk: they cannot be idle, their nature is not generous enough; and they pass those hours in a sort of coma, which are not dedicated to furious moiling in the gold-mill. When they do not require to go to the office, when they are not hungry and have no mind to drink, the whole breathing world is a blank to them. If they have to wait an hour or so for a train, they fall into a stupid trance with their eyes open. To see them, you would suppose there was nothing to look at and no one to speak with; you would imagine they were paralysed or alienated; and yet very possibly they are hard workers in their own way, and have good eyesight for a flaw in a deed or a turn of the market. They have been to school and college, but all the time they had their eye on the medal; they have gone about in the world and mixed with clever people, but all the time they were thinking of their own affairs.
Stevenson, Robert Louis. Apology for Idlers, Essays of Robert Louis Stevenson  

You can’t turn your back on your nature. I admitted to Ravelstein that reading those Keynes documents and writing the piece had been something like a holiday. Rejoining humankind, taking a humanity bath. There are times when I need to ride in the subway at rush hour or sit in a crowded movie house – that’s what I mean by a humanity bath. As cattle must have salt to lick, I sometimes crave physical contact.
Bellow, Saul. Ravelstein

Can a man who’s warm understand one who’s freezing?
Solzhenitsyn, Aleksandr. One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich  

Selected Shower Thoughts

We laugh at dogs getting excited when they hear a bark on TV, but if TV was a nonstop stream of unintelligible noises and then someone suddenly spoke to you in your language, you’d be pretty fucking startled too.

Being able to tolerate the sound of your own voice in a video is probably the highest form of self acceptance.

If elevators hadn’t been invented, all the CEOs and important people would have their offices on the first floor as a sign of status.

We do not check the refrigerator multiple times to find new food, we check to see if our standards have dropped enough to eat what was available.

You aren’t paid according to how hard you work, you are paid according to how hard you are to replace

Most of the trash you see on the ground is unhealthy food packaging because people who don’t care about their own health don’t care about the Earth’s either.

As a kid, teenagers seemed so big and scary because in most TV shows they were actually played by adults in their 20s.

Superman’s most unappreciated power is his extraordinary fine motor skill. He has almost unlimited strength and can literally move mountains, yet is also able to shake someone’s hand without inadvertently ripping off their arm.

The kids growing up gaming on tablets are going to have all the internet addiction without any of the computer skills.

Telling kids that a cop will arrest you as a disciplinary tool, then expecting kids to tell a cop if something bad is happening to them, must be confusing as hell.

People who respond with “That’s not how the world works” when told to be nice are the reason that’s not how the world works.

If a morgue worker dies they’d still need to come in to work one more time

Technically, your alarm tone is your theme song as it starts every episode

Spider-Man almost certainly has auto-rotate turned off on his phone.


A subreddit for sharing those miniature epiphanies you have that highlight the oddities within the familiar.

“Showerthought” is a loose term that applies to the types of thoughts you might have while carrying out a routine task like showering, driving, or daydreaming. At their best, showerthoughts are universally relatable and find the amusing/interesting within the mundane.

Hidden Achievements

Whats your biggest flex that you’ll never tell anyone? from r/AskReddit

When my girlfriend and I worked at the same bar, I threw a coaster at her like a frisbee. It arced over her and like twenty customers only to land perfectly on the neat stack of other coasters like 50 feet away.

It was so fucking cool but nobody noticed except one customer who I later had to kick out for taking a nap on the bar. No point in telling anybody, but I look back fondly on that moment.

I saw a guy throw a dart once and hit the back side of a dart already on the board. He was standing really far away in an attempt at flexing, and achieved way harder than he ever intended to.

We had camera phones and took pictures, but nobody believed the story anyway. He was really let down that I was the only one who noticed. So I kinda understand this story on a spiritual level.

I’m sure your toss was amazing.

I have a similar story. When I was in high school we were playing basketball in gym one time. When it was time to put the balls back on the rack in the closet and pack up, I was on the opposite side of the gym. I lined up my shot and rolled the ball across the gym like a bowling ball and it shot between several pairs of legs without getting hit and it whizzed into the closet, bumped the bottom shelf, jumped and put itself away.

Like one other dude saw me do it and he freaked out and came running across the gym to congratulate me and so I made a new friend that day LOL

I saw a lizard in the middle of a busy road. I bent down on the side of the road and called for it as I put my hands out and he ran straight into my arms. I carried him to safety and didn’t think anything of it until I heard a stranger behind me go, “Did y’all see that shit?? She’s a lizard whisperer!” Man I wish there was another witness because I bet I looked cool

I saw Elton John in Vegas. Red Piano Tour. During Benny and the Jets (I can whistle extremely loudly), I nailed the whistle part that is on live version of the song that plays on the radio. He smiled.

At one point I could sing along perfectly to we didn’t start the fire. I still know most of the words but I’m always so embarrassed to sing in front of other people lol.

I can cook 2-minute noodles in 1 minute and 47 seconds

When You’re the Asshole

I blamed my fart on a mentally challenged boy in fifth grade…

In middle school, I saw a kid walking around with a fanny pack, so I snickered and said: “Nice fanny pack”. He said: “It’s for my insulin. Just got diagnosed with diabetes.”

I was making fun of an old guy I’d seen outside our school at a basketball tournament to some friends in the locker room. He looked and talked like Farmer Fran from the Waterboy. Turned out to be the dad of one of the guys I was talking to. Still can’t even think of that movie without it bringing up endless amounts of shame.

“What’s your name?” I asked.
[Trying to be playful.] “Oh cool, like ‘Sarah-with-a-lisp.”
“I have a lisp. My name is Sarah.”


“If you run into an asshole in the morning, you ran into an asshole. If you run into assholes all day, you’re the asshole.”