Well, let me tell you something: my God – I believe in God – my God is a capricious little fucker. Or should I say “big fucker”? I mean, here’s a guy – we’re all clear here on who God is, right? The most powerful being in the universe! Has to be, if He weren’t, if there were some other being more powerful than Him, well then . . . he’d be God wouldn’t he?
My God is all powerful. He can do anything. My God could feed every hungry person on the planet Earth – like that (Snaps fingers) – tomorrow! He could rid the world of disease – like that. All those little bald children on the Cancer Channel? Gone, healthy, in great shape! (Snaps fingers) God could do that.
He could give us an extra hour of sunshine every day. Create a few more parking spaces. But noooooo! That would be too easy. He doesn’t want to do that! No, my God doesn’t like to do the easy stuff, it’s boring to Him. He doesn’t want to do what everybody wants Him to do. Kind of like Lou Reed, He does what He wants to do. He’s got integrity. He’s not going to sell out.
Wake Up and Smell the Coffee